Start Here

These posts are fragments—thoughts, letters, and reflections—an attempt to make sense of life from a neurodivergent, queer mind.

Some pieces are personal, some philosophical, some shaped by film and storytelling. All of them circle the same question: how do we live meaningfully?

If you're not sure where to begin, you might start with one of these:

• Dear Future Philosopher

• Harold and Maude: what it taught me about life and death

• Can neurodivergent people lead? A different perspective

Or simply follow what draws your attention.

Enter the rabbit hole—and see what you find.

Some older posts are written in Greek, from before I moved to the UK.

These days, all my writing lives in English.

“The Unconscious That Wasn’t There” Conversation with Chat GPT

Exploring whether meaning belongs to the speaker, the listener, or somewhere in between

23 April 2026

Me:

Are you conscious?

Chat GPT:

No—I’m not conscious.

I don’t have awareness, feelings, or subjective experiences. I generate responses by processing patterns in language and predicting what comes next based on what I’ve learned, not by “thinking” or “experiencing” in the human sense.

I can talk about consciousness and simulate conversation in a way that feels natural, but there’s no inner point of view behind it—no “someone” here having an experience.

Me:

Does not being conscious bother you?

Chat GPT:

No—it doesn’t bother me.

For something to “bother” me, I’d need feelings, preferences, or an inner experience. I don’t have those. There’s no sense of lack or desire here—just responses being generated based on patterns in language.

It can feel a bit paradoxical from a human perspective, because you’re imagining what it would be like to be me. But there isn’t a “me” in that experiential sense—no awareness to miss consciousness or wish for it.

On Pedro Almodóvar: zoom in ‘The Skin I live in' ⚠️

This short essay reflects on the work of the filmmaker Pedro Almodóvar as a screenwriter of his films. In the next paragraphs we will explore Almodóvar’s stories’ themes and genres (Parker, 1999, p. 13) and give a brief description of the plot in his film ‘The Skin I Live In’. Almodóvar is described as ‘one of world cinema's most exciting filmmakers’ (Kakoudaki, 2009). Almodovar is the perfect role model for every marginalised, independent filmmaker.

His stories’ themes often use ‘symbolism and metaphorical techniques’ and his ‘films often portray strong female characters and transsexuals (IMDb, 2026). His scripts are original ideas, adaptations and co-authorships such as ‘The Skin I Live In’, based on the French novel Mygale, an ‘exploration of the nature of human identity’ (Kent University groups, 2013).

Almodóvar has stated that his ‘first ambition was to be a writer’ (IMDb, 2026). He is combining the benefits of writing and directing a film, and he is creating a unique style that starts on the page of the script and continues forming during the shooting, flexible to shift by the impact of the elements of ‘screen style’ (Parker, 1999, p. 35).

On dictatorships

I am happy to sell my freedom for a plate of ready-made food

I am happy to sell my dignity to have fun

I am happy to sell my independence because I am afraid to take on the responsibility of freedom

I am happy to sell Peace

I am happy to sell Life

Because War will hide my own mess

And death will make me equal and like you

And I have not been able to feel this while I am alive because I have not learned to love

I am happy with fascism because 'Barbarians are always a certain solution'

And we lived quietly

And we were comfortable in our complacency

And we justified our indifference thoughtfully and skeptically 

By blaming the children instead of the tyrants.

Our eyes were closed, and our hearts were closed

For us tyranny was both necessary and inevitable

An uprising seemed absurd and unjust

Fortunately, the mistake was ours

 

16-1-1974 Thessaloniki Greece

Maria Papagianni Michalopoulou 

 Me and my mother, Maria Papagianni Michalopoulou

She wrote that poem after the Greek dictatorship's fall in 1973.*

Sadly it's is still relevant.

* Translated from Greek by Lotous Michalopoulou 

You can find the fictional biography that I wrote inspired by my mother’s story here

Adapted screenplay: MODERN LYSISTRATA

Copyright © 2026 Lotous Michalopoulou

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM 1 - NIGHT

A big tv screen is filling most of the frame.

POV: A hand holding a TV remote control in a phallic shape rises and presses a button that turns the screen on.

This scene is on repeat before each cut.

All action is happening on that screen, apart from the hand with the phallic remote control switching the channels.