Dear future historian,
Sorry. I had two days of going out for post office, grocery shopping and stuff.. and I just didn't find any time to write to you. This lockdown made me realise how much energy I loose when I go out with a 'to do list' and how happy I am at home. (At least I hugged a Tree.)
I.. how can I tell you that?
Well, just some days before the pandemic was known and the lockdown was a thing I wished to stay home for 6 months. I just felt exhausted, and I could tell that I needed a break.
The only thing at the moment that 'reasures' me that my wish was not the cause of the coronavirus is the fact that it started some months before we found out about it, before my wish.
But then the Doctor starts his time-y wimey https://youtu.be/q2nNzNo_Xps so then its again hard to eliminate completely the possibility of my responsibility for the pandemic.
Its also Jordan Peterson's
lectures about responsibility, the biblical notion of catastrophes being linked to it and how this idea led to the 'cause and effect' mindset that helped the West reach the Enlightenment.
So.. maybe it is my fault somehow. Or maybe the Christian idea of inherited guilt is so deep in me that I still can't get rid of.
Eitherway maybe I should just enjoy my calmness while I still have the chance to stay inside.
But you know by now, my dear future historian (even if my contemporaries don't know yet, that I will write one day a book called 'How to overthinking properly') my love for 'proper overthinking.'
Whether I do it continuously or not it will happen anyway. Better not without me.
Better if I try to give it a push so it won't be in circles, but it will start unravelling all the unjustified guilt that my upbringing has left me.
I need a coffee.
I'll go read something religious to stay in climate. :-p
Talk later
Stay safe and take care.
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